Coming at you from Des Moines, and we’re less than two weeks away from WM31!
I’ve been waiting to make this grand proclamation and now, it is time;
If you’ve been a reader and / or listener to the BEAR (which I can’t thank you enough) you’d know that I’m a huge Randy Orton fan. He’s one of the most physically gifted wrestlers of all time, has great ring psychology that’s often misunderstood and when given the right gimmick, he can easily be one of the best performers in the WWE.
It seems almost silly to say this about someone who’s been around for over a decade but many of of RKO’s perceived shortcomings have been due to suspensions for substance abuse / PED issues and creative misunderstandings of what works best for Randy Orton.
My favorite phase in Randy Orton’s career was “The Legend Killer” years. At first it seemed like this upstart, legacy performer was getting an undeserved push because he fit all the boxes that the WWE liked and the idea of Randy Orton beating all of these proven Superstars was too much for most people to accept. Funny, you could replace the words RANDY ORTON with ROMAN REIGNS and it would be déjà vu, all over again… strange, don’t you think? Anyway…
After the first few “legends” that RKO dispatched, he was starting to find a groove. Maybe he WAS the next Main Event-er? The antithesis of WWE’s other rising Superstar, John Cena. What really set RKO apart was that he didn’t live in the world of black and white or good and evil. RKO was new, he was the best and he was going to clear deck of all the aging Superstars to take his rightful spot as “king of the hill” and he didn’t care what you thought of him.
My favorite spot he ever did was after he’d laid waste to a crowd favorite, with the fans booing him like crazy, he’d roll out of the ring victorious and soaking in the vitriol with his arms stretched open saying, “The people love me!” (Something along those lines. I’m old and cocaine is a hell of a drug.) Was he insane? Did the writers not understand that people hated him? Was the WWE trying to push him as a face while he was beating all of the crowd favorites? NO! He was being a self-indulgent douchebag, which is the best version of Randy Orton.
When the WWE started teaming him up with the Legacies, Evolutions and Authorities of the world is when they ruined the best part of RKO. The Viper is a loner. He cares about no one but himself and should own his corner of the WWE room. People should be in fear to draw his attention. He’s not insane (another iteration that NEVER worked). He was always the odd man out in any group because he was either playing second banana to HHH or was backing up Batista or prop-ing up Ted DiBiase, Jr.
Finally, Randy Orton is back to being on his own. We don’t know what he wants, other than to be the best. He doesn’t care for or need anyone’s help. He’ll be a dick one moment and can be a hero the next, only to the extent that it will benefit Randy Orton. He should see himself as a crowd favorite, even if it’s just to the 1% of us who love douchebags. His delusion is what made him interesting. Is he the face or the heel against Rollins? Does it really matter? We’re going to get a great match. I suspect the boo / cheer demographic that Cena gets will be flipped when it comes to RKO but as well all know, it only matters that the crowd makes noise.
And for all of you that think I’m crazy, that’s fine. Feel free to let me know. But there’s no doubting the statement that RKO is one of the most naturally gifted performers. All you have to do is go back and watch RKO vs Mick Foley 2004, No Holds Bared match. We forget how good RKO can be because of the infinite times he’s faced off against Cena but let me know which one of these matches you wouldn’t want to see?
RKO vs Lesnar
RKO vs Rollins (we’ll be seeing this at WM31)
RKO vs Ziggler
RKO vs Reigns
RKO vs Daniel Bryan (seen it and want to see it again)
RKO vs Cesaro
RKO vs Rusev
RKO vs Barrett
There’s not another veteran wrestler that has the ability to match up with such a diverse group of opponents and have the ability to adapt to his opponent’s skill level and technique.
Lastly, a few words on his mic skills. That’s going to be the sticking point that most detractors will cling to when bashing RKO. Agreed, he’s not Ric Flair, Paul Heyman or even John Cena on the mic. He’s even worse when given a laundry list of talking points that he’s got to hit as if he’s Daniel Plainview trying to convince you to sell your land. What he’s good at is being a dick and keeping it short and simple. He was more than fine when he played Roast Master General going down the line of Rollins, J&J, Kane and Big Show. As Stone Cold has always said, the best characters take a person’s personality and turn it up to 11. The WWE needs to stop trying to change Randy Orton and just let him be RKO.
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So with that, let’s get to the rankings as of this week’s RAW on 3/16/2015...
- Randy Orton ( ) – I guess all Randy Orton needed was to be able to use the word “bitch” and his promos just flow. Who knew? Bitches for everyone!
- Seth Rollins w/ Minons – J&J (especially Noble-san) are really growing on me comedically. Rollins is RKO 2.0 with better mic skills. He was able to turn his home crowd pop into a solid heel promo.
- R-Truth – The dark horse pick to win the IC Title ladder match.
- Ambrose / Bryan / Ziggler – This should be one of the best matches at WM31, if not the show stealer. The bad news is that this isn’t WM and it’s hard to keep a six man match rolling with commercial breaks. The good news is the WWE is doing a good job of keeping the build up interesting.
- Stardust / Barrett / Harper – NOTHING disappoints me more than Stardust being included in this IC Ladder match instead of what seemed like a lock of a Rhodes Brother vs Brother match. But as we discussed on this week’s WrestleCast (www.worldofbear.com) every participant can make a case for winning the IC strap, which is really all you can ask for going into a big event.
- AJ Lee w/ Paige – Everyone’s favorite fetish duo. It’s amazing that the WWE’s main WM Divas match doesn’t feature a blond and only 1/4 of the participants have fake boobs. You’ve come a long way WWE. Other than this match being a little mechanical, it was solid and I expect this Divas match to crack the Top 4 at WM31.
- N-Bella w/ B-Bella – I’m convinced the WWE has a secret slush fund that invested in Johnson & Johnson Vaseline and Astroglide products as they were booking this match. Other than then not having a blond, you’ve check all the kinky sex nerd boxes. Oh, I’m not hating, I’m speaking from experience. I’m all in on this match.
- Miz and Damien Miz-dow – The best duo in all of entertainment. They’re biggest accomplishment is that they made me care about a Ryback match. If you’re looking for an unlikely winner of the Andre BR, look no further than Damien Sandow.
- Paul Heyman – Not as great as the previous two weeks, where he just killed everything like an atom bomb. Still the GOAT of mic work. The third time that the “mic has been cut” bit was too obvious a planned gimmick so I had to knock his ranking down a few slots.
- Roman Reigns – Time to bust out the new merch and add to the catch phrases. He really is The Rock’s cousin. You know what, he was good! He needs to embrace the fact he’s more laid back by nature. Think Kevin Nash-ish. Fun loving, took nothing too serious because he’s Kevin Nash and would destroy anyone he wanted to BUT if you pissed him off, watch out! That’s how Reigns should play it. He’s just not as naturally intense as Ambrose or Rollins.
- Bray Wyatt – Love him or hate him, he’s putting in ALL OF THE WORK to set up his match with The Undertaker. Early betting line is out; the Under / Over for both entrances at WM is 15 minutes.
- Sting – Finally does SOMETHING in a WWE ring and shows signs of life. Who knows what this HHH / Sting match will actually look like but at least we have signs of life from the Stinger.
- HHH and Stephanie – Didn’t do much but they confirmed that The Authority is 100% behind Rollins and also pushed the HHH / Sting feud forward.
- John Cena – I support the effort to elevate the US Title but when you hear the 15 time WHC drone on and on about it…just calm down. Here’s what I want, Lana to flip! You heard it hear first. How great would it be when Rusev loses to Cena, Lana decides to go with the “new” super athlete. This could set up a whole Kayfabe / Total Divas / N-Bella vs Lana / Rusev fighting to get his woman back set of storylines. It’s 100% Empire (the greatest show on TV) and is the only thing that could make me care about this match.
- Rusev w/ Lana – No LANA?! I’m out.
- Tyson Kidd and Cesaro w/ Natalya ( ) – FACT; dressing in all black is cool. FACT; they are the holders of the Big Penny belts. FACT; are better clappers than The New Day.
- The New Day – Why did it seem like they were trying to teach the good, hard working farm folks of Iowa how to clap with rhythm? Sorry The New Day, I don’t think the birthing ground of the Tea Party is ready for such progressive movements. As you can see, I know nothing about Iowa and think the whole state is like the town from Footloose. (Weird because both my grandparents are from Iowa, but that could explain my horrendous dancing skills.)
- Los Matadores w/ El Dorito – I will be at WM31. Over my dead body, will this group be Tag Champs. If they win and you see them cut away because a fan has jumped the wall to steal back the Tag Championships, you know where to start looking. My excuse is that I’m doing it for the great good of the wrestling world. I defy a jury of my piers to disagree with me. I’ll go Colonel Jessup on their ass, “I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for ‘El Torito,’ and you curse the ‘Los Matadores.’ You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That 'El Torito's' death, while tragic, probably saved 'careers.' And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves careers You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a 'crowd' who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very ‘storylines’ that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide 'them.' I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a ‘pen,’ and ‘start writing.’ Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.”
- Ryback – I still can’t believe CROWDS of humans feel the need to chant, feed me more. You’re all insane. I’ll have nothing to do with this nonsense.
- Big Show vs Erick Rowan – I’m tired, can we just wrap this up??? What is it that you really expect me to say?
Honorable Mentions
Sheamus – Returns………… eventually? Hey, WWE, he’s no Undertaker, get his ass in the ring.
Brock Lesnar – Lesnar and WWE production puts on some of the best promo videos. Also, I believe this means he’s staying. Imagine if he looses, either to Reigns or in turn to Rollins, and we get to see mad / hunt mode Lesnar chase the title??? FUCK YEAH!
Larry Zbyszko – HOF and WCW’s version of Jerry “The King” Lawler
Side note(s)
Another outstanding night for Booker, who keeps delivering. Not only do I truly believe Booker thinks wrestling storylines are real but now he’s obsessed with this Bella twin magic. More specifically their “Evil” magic. He’s already got the old voodoo witch doctor hair style and I think I just read a story arc with him in the latest Shadowman comic?
The Usos HURT?! Let’s see how they play this off over the next week.
Andre Battle Royal aka The dregs. Early favorites to win: Goldust, #AxelMania, Kane, Big Show and Mark Henry.
Until next time…
WK
@wkbear
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