WWE Power Rankings, as of 9-02-2013 RAW

Here we are again, friends.  The second installment of the WWE power rankings, as of RAW as of 9/02/2013.  It’s far too hot and humid today for me to leave my air-conditioned cave, even at night, so in lieu of me running around getting sweaty, I’ll watch other grown men run around and get sweaty on my behalf.  I’m hoping to loose a few pounds through the osmosis of my television screen.  Without further ado...

1. HHH (1, last week) – Right off the bat I wasn’t happy with HHH’s opening.  I know this is a technical thing but as a viewer, I like to see and here the entrance.  Give me two seconds of nothing and then hit the music of the opening performer.  It gives it a little pazazz.  This led to HHH doing an intro to RKO?  OK, fine, it was only 2 minutes into a three hour show, but like I said, it’s been hot as hell and my patience is thin.  Luckily it wasn’t long before he had the Plains-folk of Iowa eating out of the palm of his hand.  HHH has hit a new stride as the corporate figure head of the WWE.  It’s not like he was ever terrible on the mic but I don’t remember him being this good and this comfortable.  Maybe when he doesn’t have a pending match where he’s getting his brain bashed by a chair or tossed around the ring, he’s more focused on the story that needs to be told and he’s becoming a true ring / show MC.
2. Daniel Bryan (3) – Another great promo.  The key to any RAW is a great opening and a good finish.  He’s being pushed as THE face.  He got Big Show to cry over him.  He added to his hero’s journey.  He got the crap beat out of him.  He’s the underdog to RKO’s Corporate / Champ / heel.     
3. The Shield (5) – I almost had to break them up with Ambrose running in to be Ziggler’s opponent but luckily (or maybe un-luckily) Ryback interrupted the match which caused the rest of The Shield to mount-up.  Add to the fact they again played as enforcers to HHH and RKO, they’re holding a top spot.
4. Dolph Ziggler (4) – Was he in a match?  Yup.  Did I have to wast time listening to a stupid shoot?  Nope.  Did Ziggler kill it?  Yep.  So does he change in ranking?  Not for a second.  It doesn’t matter who he ended up wrestling, he did his job.  He could have even gone higher by proving he can put anyone over, i.e. Ryback.
5. Randy Orton (2) – Still the champ and rocking the belt nicely.  So how / why did I drop RKO down to five?  I have to drop his ranking for one reason and one reason only.  Showing a clip from Smackdown where RKO spray-paints a knocked out Daniel Bryan with the letters NO.  This is only one letter away from a complete ripoff of the old NWO days.  They might have had the same type of scene as the old NWO days, where there’d be 4 to 10 guys in the ring surrounding their fallen opponent and spray-painting him with NWO, but RKO and The Shield work for the establishment.  I’m glad I’m not recapping Smackdown otherwise I’d have to expand.  I’ll end this by saying, it’s not the 90’s and the WWE is on such a high streak that I expect a little better.  RKO cut a solid promo but just for this week, I’m taking away points of unnecessary unoriginality.  I hope you learned your lesson WWE, now don’t do it again.  I don’t like doling such harsh punishments.  But like a dog peeing on you couch, you have to break them of the habit fast and hard.
6. Rob Van Dam (9) – Give RVD an announcer like he used to have with Bill Alfonso in ECW and I’m a happy man.  I love me some RVD, but let’s just say he’s not The Whole F’n Show because of his mic skills.  He’s the #1 contender for the World Championship belt.  I want him to win but I have a feeling this is a way to put over Alberto Del Rio as a bigger heel.  That’s why I’m giving RVD a push up now.  He’s not a “chaser”; he’s better with a title and having people chase him for the championship.  I expect that I’ll have to drop him in the rankings soon so I’ll give him a push up while I can.
7. Paul Heyman (7) – Doing Paul Heymen-y things.  He can sell anything, especially anything that’s “best for business.” 
8. The Wyatt Family (8) – We finally got a few answers to what happened to Kane after the Wyatt Family took him out in Summer Slam.  The promo was great.  I can’t wait to see what ends up happening with Kane in the coming weeks.  Without having to even appear live, this might be the most intriguing storyline yet to unfold.
9. CM Punk (6) – This is all because of my bias for heels.  Punk had a great promo and did a nice “dirty” face shoot.  The crowd ate it up.  Maybe this will be the norm for now.  Maybe he is turning into the Stone Cold of 2013 but I want the rebel.  I want the bad guy.  Give me a few weeks and I’ll either get over it OR, god willing, Punk will be back to the dark side.
10. Cody Rhodes (HM) – As I mentioned last week, I probably overlooked Rhodes.  He’s a solid performer and he, HHH and RKO had a great mini shoot backstage (again, WWE is blurring the lines harder than #ROBINTHICK).  A few years ago I would have bet everything I had on RKO and Rhodes being in the main event on every PPV but circumstances change, gimmicks don’t take off, people don’t pass drug tests, etc.  Luckily both seem to be back on track to take the main stage.  Maybe it all worked out for the best because their missed opportunities allowed guys like CM Punk to take off and now the WWE is stocked with quality at the top of the card.  Rhodes deserves to be on this list each week, let’s hope he can stay here.  AND I won’t stop saying it until it happens, I’m down for the Rhodes / Goldust match anytime anywhere.  It’s the one match that needs no set up and could main event or at least be a top PPV match.  Dustin ain’t getting any younger.  (*Clearly, this didn’t end well for Rhodes.  See the notes section for more.)
11. AJ Lee (11) – You know when you’ve done well when they replay your promo and you cause an uproar just by showing up.  If I had told you this was all caused by a male wrestler, you’d think The Rock had made a comeback.  As I said last week, it’s now up to AJ and the other Divas to run with this momentum.  Let’s keep watching to see what they do.
12. Prime Time Players (15) – Yes, I know they beat 3MB but crushing a handicap match is worth points.  I’ll agree with JBL and say that Titus O’Neil is a monster and could be awesome.  For now, he and Young make a formidable tag challenge.  Let’s see if they’re the ones who will be next for The Shield’s tag straps or is their destiny lie in the way of the Wyatt Family (just throwing that out there, it could be and interesting shoot)?
13. The Miz (16) – Getting a match against Fandango and subsequent feud leads me to believe that he’s back and getting his shot at becoming more of a player.  No matter what you may think of Fandango, he can wrestle and the two should be able to put on a good feud.  
14. Fandango (14) – If you’re going to be in a feud, than you’re going to ride-or-die with your opponent.  I’m throwing Fandango with MIZ because they put on a good match together.  All the more props to Fandango if he really did get a broken nose during the commercial break.  They might have bungled the finish a little but I’ll rate on a curve if Fandango really did break his nose.
15. The Big Show (N/A) – ‘Show is on the same level as Kane and Mark Henry.  He’s always there and always big.  WWE has grown more to use Big Show as a prop and depending on the situation, Big Show is either a good prop or a wasted prop.  Tonight he was used nicely.  Also, for HHH to throw in the “ironclad” contract is a classic WWE wink to the “smart” fans.  Stephanie for bringing up him being “broke” (And who wouldn’t want life coaching performed in front of 20,000 people?).  Then again, who cares if they’re broke when “giants don’t live as long as regular people” (backstage Vince is glowing with pride).  Basically, Stephanie just told the world, you’re going to die soon (which again, coming from a McMahon is scary because it could mean so many things, one being the truth).  I picture Big Show on a Breaking Bad binge watching session and thinking, his new gimmick be that he should pull a Heisenberg and turn completely evil to provide for his family before he dies.
16. Damien Sandow (NA) – Put on a solid match with RVD.  Doesn’t look like he’s going to be fighting with Rhodes.  Other than having a nifty leather MITB briefcase, I don’t know what they’re going to do with him.  Having said that, tonight he had a good night.
17. Alberto Del Rio (10) – He didn’t really do anything.  He came out and did the “distraction” thing to RVD but RVD still one the match.  Setting up for a big match at Night of Champions.  It’s another one of these, “We’ll have to see what happens.”  Not much to complain about or give credit to.
18. Ryback (N/A) – He should give half his paycheck to Ziggler for making him look great and getting on this list.
19. Booker T (N/A) – Can a retired HOF’er come out and do a shoot promo and make it on this list?  Yup, they can.  Especially when you’re half of Harlem Heat and 5-time 5-time 5-time 5-time 5-time world champion.  And you know this, SUUUUUCCCKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
20. Los Matadores (N/A) – Look, WWE has always been great at setting up even the dumbest of gimmicks.  Part of the reason the Gobbledy Gooker was so bad is that they took the time and effort and really sold that something cool / awesome was going to happen.  Then it turned out to be just an egg with a man dressed as a turkey inside it.  (Yes, for all you non wrestling fans, there was a man...dressed like a turkey...inside an egg...that was a headliner for a PPV once upon a time.)  As much of a train-wreck Los Matadores looks to be, I’m still excited for their arrival. 

Honorable Mention

NONE

Side Note(s) – Great match between RKO and Rhodes.  I don’t know if there’s any back story to this “final match” by Rhodes but I can’t imagine his career is over.  Maybe he just needs time off.  In my youth, I’d be running to internet to find out the real story but I’ll let this one play out. 

This was a typical status quo show.  Other than the Rhodes angle, there really wasn’t anything new to add.  Story lines got pushed a little further along towards the next PPV.  It was a solid show.

Until next week...